This is a little game that I like to play with my bestie, Stephanie. She is the queen of random and when we are together, I’ve started putting the weirdo things she says in the notes section of my phone. This way, I can remind her later how weird she is and how I should get a medal or, at the very least, a freaking certificate for putting up with her ;) Here is a glimpse into some of the weirdness I endured yesterday afternoon (that’s right. I skipped out of work early to hang out with my bestie! Muahahahahaha!)
- Don’t RUSH me! I’m trying to get red paper and parsley outta my teeth!
- She was diagnosed with pregnant. (Stephanie said this. She is not, in fact, pregnant. Thank the Good Lord.)
- Huh. Time escapes me sometimes . . .
- He was on my ass quicker than I knew it! (This was in reference to somebody tailgating while we were driving)
- I could be a pirate. Kinda like a farm girl. (She said this when she saw a life-size Captain Morgan statue at a bar. The farm girl thing is another story for another day. But trust me, it’s a good one.)
- She invites trouble over by leaving her blinds open! (She was talking about her neighbor.)
- I’m gonna leave the lid off of these potatoes until they cool. Why? Because food sours when you put it in the fridge while it’s still warm. Yes it does, Tara!
I’m pretty sure I could make this a series of blog posts about the weird-ass random shit she says and does. Some of these things have a long and involved story behind them and others are just the randomness that she blurts out. Maybe I should make it a contest . . . whoever comes up with the funniest story behind a comment will win a prize! I have to find a prize that is 1) something that I can afford to give away, 2) worth a shit, & 3) something that I can afford to give away. I have 2 small children and I’m broke, y’all! But I’ll come up with something fantastic. So, your job over the weekend (or maybe a little longer, depending on how long it takes me to come up with a prize) is to come up with a ridiculous story that would end with one of the above comments and if I like your’s the best, you might just win a prize!